tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16111608784619501122024-03-13T08:57:24.776-04:00Mochaccino ChaiSharing, Complaining, Musing, WonderingFarheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.comBlogger50125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-39062773174686677992008-07-10T21:38:00.003-04:002008-07-10T21:40:51.903-04:00Changing BlogI've decided to continue my blogging on WordPress, mainly because they enable more creativity. From now on I will be blogging <a href="http://mochaccinochai.wordpress.com/">here</a>. <br /><br />I have transferred some of my posts from here over there as well just to keep some of the ones I feel are most important together. <br /><br />See you there!Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-81261986582922175742008-07-05T20:05:00.005-04:002008-07-05T20:14:35.312-04:00My Favourite Bollywood Songs - Part 7 (now otherwise known as "My Fob Self")This song is a classic and still a favourite for many. I have never seen the film and have no desire to ever see it. The song is enough for me. Though apparently, since the film was directed and produced by Aamir Khan's father, Aamir Khan actually has a role in it as a child actor. Funny. <br /><br />Song: <a href="http://www.bollywoodlyrics.com/categories/index.asp?id=1&lyricid=674">Chura Liya Hai Tumne Jo Dil Ko</a><br />Film: <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yaadon_Ki_Baraat">Yaadon Ki Baraat</a> (1973)<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ApOIJZrFenU&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ApOIJZrFenU&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-36946958222924584242008-07-05T19:57:00.003-04:002008-07-05T20:03:04.001-04:00I Really Am StraightThere's this group invite on my Facebook page which has been sitting there for weeks. It's for <a href="http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/group.php?gid=5558701638"><span style="font-style: italic;">Salaam: Queer Muslim Community</span></a> and I've been wanting to join it to show my support for and solidarity with queer Muslims, but considering I'm a single straight Muslim woman looking to find a single, straight Muslim guy, I'm not sure if that would be a good idea. I'm afraid it may make it seem as if I'm a lesbian. And of course, there's nothing wrong with that except I'm not a lesbian and I don't want potential male partners thinking I am. They'll avoid me more than they do now. So I don't think I'm going to join BUT I do support LGBTQ Muslims.Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-69582590203904384532008-07-05T19:53:00.002-04:002008-07-05T19:54:38.210-04:00New BackgroundAlthough I'm not a huge fan of blue, I find this new background quite soothing on the eyes. Let's try it for a while.Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-16039008695486468722008-07-03T18:05:00.005-04:002008-12-09T09:02:19.610-05:00Frustrations RemainBah! I've already gotten a complaint about the new colours. I'll keep trying.<br /><br />I've found a new roommate for next year! Yay! She seems very cool. A first year law student. I'm looking forward to getting to know someone from outside the department as well. As much as I like the people in psychology, sometimes it's nice to get away from them. I am very much in the mood to meet new people. Lots of new people. I think I'm becoming a bit of an extrovert. Curious. Anyhow, let's hope it all works out. Oh, and my new roommate is of Korean origin. I have not had a single White roommate yet. Interesting eh?<br /><br />I'm frustrated with my supervisor. She hasn't gotten back to me on my minor paper. It was supposed to be done by June 30th. It's a few days past. And nothing! Ugh!!! I need to get this done over the next week. Absolutely have to. I'm praying that it gets done in that time Insha'Allah.<br /><br />On another note, I think I am in love with my ex. I think I will tell him. What have I got to lose? Not much. If he doesn't feel the same, (I am 95% sure he doesn't) at least I will know for sure. And maybe telling me will make my own feelings clear to me. Until I tell him and find out, I don't think I'll be able to move on completely. Not whole heartedly at least. So we'll see. Insha'Allah I hope it works out well. Otherwise, my love life is STILL non-existent. This is the one area of my life I have given up working on. At this point if God has someone for me I really do hope He brings him to me. *Sigh*<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://insecureflaky.deviantart.com/art/Frustration-82666381"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SG1ROSznzVI/AAAAAAAAAKw/GT2nL2AasII/s400/Frustration_by_InsecureFlaky.png" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5218916849200647506" border="0" /></a>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-83405941563981724382008-07-01T01:21:00.003-04:002008-07-03T18:50:21.608-04:00My Favourite Bollywood Songs - Part 6Song: <a href="http://www.bollywhat.com/lyrics/dilse_lyr.html#5">Satrangi Re</a><br />Film: <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dil_Se">Dil Se</a> (1998)<br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/DW4tR-59uz4&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/DW4tR-59uz4&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></embed></object><br /><br />I thought they tried too hard to be "contemporary" and "artsy" but the song is still very beautiful!! The lyrics are in Urdu, and beautiful Urdu poetry at that. Additionally, it has a very obvious Sufi touch. <br /><br />And yes, yet another Shah Rukh Khan song.Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-88280594136622108192008-06-30T21:02:00.001-04:002008-06-30T21:02:36.126-04:00Changing the FormatEveryone seems to be changing their blog format. I thought I would too.Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-25551565414062081932008-06-30T20:27:00.007-04:002008-12-09T09:02:19.733-05:00Weekend in Chi-Town<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SGl8F_JWZWI/AAAAAAAAAKg/LFUa8kiLCq4/s1600-h/DSC01942.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SGl8F_JWZWI/AAAAAAAAAKg/LFUa8kiLCq4/s400/DSC01942.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5217838085577270626" border="0" /></a>I'm getting very bad at posting. I don't feel like writing lately. Not only that I don't have much to say.<br /><br />I went to Chicago this past weekend. I love the city. It has the most beautiful architecture. And so much history. We were there for a conference. The <a href="http://www.spssi.org/">SPSSI</a> conference. (By "we" I mean myself, a grad student colleague, and my supervisor). I was able to make it to the <a href="http://egov.cityofchicago.org/city/webportal/portalEntityHomeAction.do?entityName=Taste+of+Chicago&entityNameEnumValue=166">Taste of Chicago</a> festival though I didn't eat very much. Better that way considering there was so much soul food at the festival. And we all know how fattening soul food can be. Probably why it's so tasty. The people of Chicago are so nice and friendly. If I were to ever move to the States (very unlikely to happen) Chicago would be one city I would be OK living in. I think it may be the only city. Though I've heard the state of Vermont is very Canadian-esque. May not be a bad choice, if I HAD to chose.<br /><br />I had to share a room with my supervisor. Didn't turn out to be as bad as I thought. We had our own beds so it worked out fine. Though I have to admit, seeing my supervisor in her jammys was a little awkward.<br /><br />The conference went well. I made a few contacts which is one of the perks of conferences I enjoy. But this conference also made me realize the differences we have with our neighbours to the south.<br /><br />For one, my colleague presented a poster on her research for which she took a socialist-feminist perspective. Apparently, some of her American readers were shocked and uneasy with the word 'socialist.' Funny, considering one of our main political parties, the <a href="http://www.ndp.ca/">NDP</a>, is really a socialist party. Socialism is something we Canadians have become very comfortable with whereas our neighbours still seem to shake in their boots. Very curious.<br /><br />Second, presenters kept referring to Indian people as Asian Indians. Asian Indians? Technically they are the ONLY Indians in this world. In Canada, Indians are East Indians. Indians as our neighbours know them are Natives, First Nations, or Indigenous people. Only old school people and insensitive, clueless people use the term "Indian" when referring to our indigenous people.<br /><br />It was also interesting how I was lumped into being Indian. In one talk I attended on "Asian Indians" the speaker noted how many Indians there were in the audience. She included me in that count. I love my Indian counterparts and I believe we basically have the same culture, but I don't like my Pakistani heritage being denied. Then another researcher, when informing a third party about our mutual research interests said "We're interested in studying South Asians, mainly Indians." No!! Not mainly Indians! I want to study all South Asians. If anything mainly Pakistanis. I found this extra emphasis on Indians especially interesting since in Canada most psychological and/or sociological work on South Asians, as limited as it is, seems be being conducted on Muslim and/or Pakistani South Asians, by Muslim and/or Pakistani South Asians. I found my Pakistani-ness being denied. Strange.<br /><br />Overall a good experience.Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-18092914353606154232008-06-23T21:06:00.007-04:002008-06-23T22:04:02.241-04:00A month of fantasyJune has been a very busy month for me. I wish I had written more but the stresses of the month left me devoid of any desire to write. The beginning of the month was spent preparing for a conference, the next fews day at the conference, and the time since at home with my family. Tomorrow I head back to my school town, but Alhumdollilah only for a few weeks. I will then Insha'Allah be coming back here.<br /><br />The conference went well. Things went very well Alhumdollilah.<br /><br />I met up with my ex last week too. And I think, though I'm very unsure, I think I may still be in love with him. But I don't know. We are such different people. We argue about everything. But healthy arguments. Rarely do they get heated. Just debate-ful. Yet he confides a lot in me too. <br /><br />I don't believe we can only love once. I know we can love more than once. And I think I will always love him. This does not mean I cannot love anyone else. Insha'Allah I will love again. But I'm still very confused about my feelings for my ex. Especially since in the past few conversations we've had I've received mixed messages from him. Things said to me such as "Someone like you could never love someone like me" or "you always misunderstood me."<br /><br />But then I wonder if the reason I think I am still in love with him is because I am alone and I need someone to fall back on. Believing that I am in love with him will give me someone to focus on perhaps. Or at the very least placing such importance on my love for him will.<br /><br />I do not doubt that I love him nor that he loves me. But whether or not I am IN love with him is what confuses me. And I very strongly doubt that he is in love with me. In fact, I am quiet sure he is not.<br /><br />I have this fantasy - a fantasy of unrequited love. In it, I am in love with him. He is not in love with me. I don't care. I will always be in love with him and love him from afar. I will always pray for his happiness and will try to make him happy in whichever way I can - from afar. I have another fantasy in which I am the one to save him from his self-destructive lifestyle (which he has). I will be the one to come in and change his life for the better.<br /><br />I know these are just fantasies are just that - fantasies. Yet they make me wonder whether I should let him know. Do I want to tell him how I feel? Am I missing something by not telling him? What if he feels similar but, like me, as a self protective measure, not admitting it? I have done whatever I can to convince him that I am not in love with him. I don't want to make myself vulnerable to him. I don't want him to have any upper hand. Am I letting my ego get in the way in this situation? Should I take this risk and tell him? I don't really have a lot to lose. We hardly ever talk to each other anymore and we never see each other either. It wouldn't be as if we would have to avoid each other or would talk much less. We already keep our distance from each other. That would just continue. My only fear would be losing him completely. But I don't think he would want to do that.<br /><br />But then do I want to tell him because I actually am in love with him or is it because I am lonely? Is it because I have no one else in my life? When I was in my first relationship after him, I missed him so much. But in the next relationship I didn't. In that relationship I remember thinking "I don't miss him anymore. I must be over him." So this makes me have doubts. Yet, things always come back to him. I have no idea what's going on in my head, or my heart rather.<br /><br />The research I want to do for my dissertation is highly inspired by him. I want to do research to help him. Yes, even my academic work is a part of my fantasy.<br /><br />Oh dear...I don't know what to do. Matters of the heart are so confusing.Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-49872889865533504132008-05-30T20:12:00.009-04:002008-12-09T09:02:19.928-05:00A Few Days Grey<div></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://kittylover17.deviantart.com/art/Saddness-plague-76838208"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SEChG3aAwPI/AAAAAAAAAKY/8s2DSUQGVlo/s320/Saddness_plague_by_Kittylover17.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5206338308564631794" border="0" /></a>My posts are getting more and more scarce. Oh well, it's like an online diary. I write when I want right? Anyhow, lately I haven't felt like writing much. This past week has not been good although I am much better now (except for these oh so annoying hiccups). Earlier this week I found out that another of the four other girls in my program and in my year has gotten engaged. So that's one married, three engaged, and one single...and that single one is me. And it hit me HARD. I fell into a depression for two days just realizing how alone I am, crying my eyes out the whole time. Sure there are people around me but that's not the same. I am lonely. And to be honest it's very difficult to see any hope sometimes. Now, I know that God tells us never to feel hopeless. We should always have faith in God and not fear. Those who fear are weak in faith. But this is hard to do. I've been trying to have faith. And it is getting better. I've been trying to get into Sufi philosophy more and I've started reading Eckhart Tolle's <a href="http://eckharttolle.com/a_new_earth">A New Earth</a> - supposedly the greatest thing since sliced bread. And so far so good. I'm enjoying it. And it is helping. As well, Broken Mystic has been teaching me a lot about Sufism, the philosophy of which has helped. Thanks dude.<br /><br />Additionally, I'm actively trying to fix the situation. I'm back online searching - a venue I hate to be honest. But I feel like I am at least making an attempt. I'm also trying to relocate for the next year. I'm convinced that the city I live in is a huge hindrance to my love life. They do say that God helps those who help themselves. Let's hope this is true Insha'Allah.Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-70463745649095762012008-05-22T01:57:00.006-04:002008-06-30T21:37:22.239-04:00My Favourite Bollywood Songs - Part 5I promise that soon enough I will get back to real posts. I have so much to say but <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">sooooo</span> little time. May is super crazy month for me. SUPER CRAZY BUSY. So until then, to appease myself and to ease my own guilt every time I see that same "May 12<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">th</span>, 2008" on my latest post, I will post another of my favourite <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Bollywood</span> songs.<br /><br />I find this song so haunting and beautiful. This one is from a movie which was a the first of its kind depicting a cross border love story between a Pakistani woman and Indian man. The movie was enjoyable. However, I hated the way they showed Pakistanis. It wasn't anything negative, just inaccurate. What Punjabi Pakistani does the whole <span style="font-style: italic;"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">adab</span></span> thing? NONE!! What Pakistani Punjabi man wears <span style="font-style: italic;">pajama-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">kurta</span>? </span>NONE!! What Pakistani Punjabi woman wears the <span style="font-style: italic;"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">gharara</span></span>? NONE!! Not in everyday life at least. Seriously! They depicted us Punjabi Pakistani Muslims like their own Muslims from, like, Lucknow or something. Ugh! Not that there is anything wrong with their culture, but our culture is different. Just because we are <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">desi</span> Muslims does not mean we are all the same. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">Ohhh</span>...I should do a critical analysis of Muslims in Veer-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">Zaara</span>. Add to my long list of critiques. Anyhow, at least we weren't portrayed as pure evil like in some other <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Bollywood</span> films. This film came out when India and Pakistan were just starting to this latest bout of good relations. Personally I think the fact that this film was a hit means that the people of the sub-continent perhaps are not so hostile to each other.<br /><br />Song: <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">Tere</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">Liye</span><br />Film: <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Veer-Zaara">Veer-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12">Zaara</span></a> (2004) (If you have not seen this film and plan to see it, do not click on the link. Desi people cannot keep a secret.)<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/fb2AeQpol-g&hl=en"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/fb2AeQpol-g&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" height="355" width="425"></embed></object>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-87427277986950727292008-05-12T19:05:00.008-04:002008-12-09T09:02:20.302-05:00On the Pitfalls of Being a PerfectionistIt, I'm sure, will come as no surprise to those who know me when I say that I am a perfectionist. I think to get into graduate school one has to be. But being a perfectionist has it's disadvantages and the most disruptive of which, for me, is procrastination.<br /><br />I've spent the last two days avoiding writing a paper on issues to consider when conducting violence against women research in minority populations. Why? Because this is not my area of expertise. I am new to this. So I'm scared to write it. In two days I have written one page. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Eeek</span>. And I'm presenting this in 4 and a half weeks at a conference.<br /><br />For the past two days I've had Word open. I would approach the paper. Write a little. Then decide I was hungry and get something to eat. I would come back to the paper, think about what to write, re-think about what to write, then get annoyed and go get something else to eat. Then I would decide "maybe I need to read more." So I would pull out the many papers I've found on the topic of violence against women, and read a little only to realize that it wasn't helping and that I may be wasting time reading. So I would then go back to the paper, write a little more with nay a care about well formed sentences, get stuck, and take another break. I would look at my many written notes and not know how to organize them, get annoyed and take another break. This has continued for the past two days. Yesterday I promised today would not be like this, and today I make the same promise about tomorrow. I just hope I can keep it. And now I have another paper to work which does not scare me as much, but on which I have <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">procrastinated</span> all semester.<br /><br />Procrastination is my life.<br /><br /><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5199652604921758690" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SCjgfsfLw-I/AAAAAAAAAKQ/5LbQePoQZ80/s320/phd071307s.gif" border="0" />Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-24883287398469593362008-05-07T00:00:00.004-04:002008-05-15T22:05:07.641-04:00My Favourite Bollywood Songs - Part 4This song came out when I was about 13 or 14 and I remember hearing the previews for it and LOVING it. I was so looking foward to hearing the whole song. But I also remember that this song created a lot of controversy because of its double meanings - <em>Choli Ke Peeche</em>, or Behind the blouse. However, me and my family too, loved the song. We found it so catchy. And it seems so did most people because if memory serves me correctly this song was super popular. I've always loved Madhuri Dixit and Sanjay Dutt too.<br /><br />Song: <a href="http://www.mariajju.com/dance/bollywood11.html">Choli Ke Peeche</a><br />Film: <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0107311/">Khal Nayak</a> (1993)<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/q5LfpWjM1Lo&hl=en"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/q5LfpWjM1Lo&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-25285260308318937062008-05-06T18:31:00.007-04:002008-05-06T19:40:47.954-04:00My Favourite Bollywood Songs - Part 3I love this song. Kajol is one of my favourite actresses and Aamir Khan is amazing always.<br /><br />And, the <a href="http://www.bollywhat.com/lyrics/fana_lyr.html#2">lyrics</a> of this song are so beautiful.<br /><br />Song: Mere Haath Mein (In My Hands)<br />Film: Fanaa (2006)<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/oWZlZYP7vDE&hl=en"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/oWZlZYP7vDE&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-12198631983892956392008-05-02T20:30:00.004-04:002008-12-09T09:02:20.485-05:00My Pledge for May<a href="http://whitepearlvoice376.deviantart.com/art/SUGAR-BOX-66526780"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5195948044732074642" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SBu3N6WkCpI/AAAAAAAAAKA/Z0Zzp3Jna1w/s320/__SUGAR_BOX___by_whitepearlvoice376.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />My pledge for the month of May is that I will give up sugar and fried food, and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">exercise</span> more to see if I can lose the little <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">pudge</span> I have in my midsection. This part of my body is the one I've been struggling with forever it seems. I've spent many, many, many hours at the gym trying to reduce this section only to lose weight everywhere I didn't need to. But my midsection kept it's little <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">pudge</span>. No doubt the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">pudge</span> is small but it's there. And the one part of my body I would love to have toned is my midsection. I just love the look of a toned midsection.<br /><br />Giving up the fried food should be easy but sugar will be a struggle. Especially once that time of month roles around.<br /><br />May 1st:<br /><br />I did have sugar. I had remnants of a chocolate which I had to finish so I had one piece of it, sharing the rest with my roommate and friend.<br /><br />May 2<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">nd</span><br /><br />Today I've been good. I had a sugar free pastry today and some vanilla oat cereal which has sugar in it. Other than that no sugar. But no <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">exercise</span> either.<br /><br />Let's see how long I can keep this up.Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-81499857313962847522008-04-26T19:16:00.012-04:002008-12-09T09:02:20.940-05:00I Am Not One of ThemThem being Muslims. I am a Muslim but my religion is my own business and it is between me and God. I feel absolutely no connection nor any obligation to those people. At one point in my academic life I had wanted to do research on them. But then they hurt me. They hurt at a time when I was the most vulnerable I have ever been in my life. They tried to make me think God hated me. They tried to tell me that God would never forgive me. They tried to tell me that God was petty and cruel. And they almost made me believe all this. They made me think God had deceived me. Now I know who the real deceivers are. I know who the real liars are. It is them. God is perfect. Islam is perfect.<br /><div><div><div></div><br /><div>Now I will never help them. They can fend for themselves. I will not do research to better their lives. They don't need me and I don't need them.<br /></div><br /><div>It's unfortunate when I have to face Islamophobia but that does not make me feel any more affiliation with them. I will deal with that with the help of God. And so will they. I will not help them. I will not work for the betterment of their lives. If their lives are bettered due to my work it will be by coincidence.<br /><br /></div><br /><div><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SBO96aWkCmI/AAAAAAAAAJo/jVoAA0v22dg/s1600-h/desi_inside_det3.jpg"></a><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SBO-8KWkCoI/AAAAAAAAAJ4/UPOCmpMFS4Y/s1600-h/desi_inside_det3.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5193704736068733570" style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SBO-8KWkCoI/AAAAAAAAAJ4/UPOCmpMFS4Y/s200/desi_inside_det3.jpg" border="0" /></a>I will however work to better the lives of my fellow South Asians. They have not hurt me. They have given me love and respect. They have not made me feel inferior. They have not tried to destroy my relationship with God. For all their faults, in my eyes, they are much better than Muslims.<br /><br /></div><br /><div>I purposely dress so that I am not identified as one of them. Not because I don't want non-Muslims to not know that I am Muslim. I want them to know. I tell people proudly that I am a Muslim. I don't want Muslims to know that I am Muslim. I will tell them if they ask but I don't volunteer the information. I will not wear long, loose shirts that cover my figure. I have curves damn it and I don't care who knows. I will wear capris that show off my sexy ankles. I will wear short sleeves. Oh riske! And I sure as hell will not cover my hair.</div><div></div><br /><div>I love Islam and I love God with all that is in me. I will never leave them and I pray they never leave me. I will be a Muslim and defend Islam until I die.<br /></div><br /><div>But I dislike Muslims. They are not my people.</div></div><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SBO-taWkCnI/AAAAAAAAAJw/FkqKihtWugQ/s1600-h/BADSHAHI.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5193704482665663090" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SBO-taWkCnI/AAAAAAAAAJw/FkqKihtWugQ/s320/BADSHAHI.jpg" border="0" /></a> </div>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-25451051262225324562008-04-24T00:00:00.005-04:002008-05-06T19:15:43.646-04:00My Favourite Bollywood Songs - Part 2I love this song. It's so romantic and so beautiful. I'd love Shah Rukh Khan to sing this to me.<br /><br />Song: <a href="http://www.bollywoodlyrics.com/categories/index.asp?id=1&lyricid=540">Suraj Hua Madham</a> (The Sun Has Dimmed)<br />Film: Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Ghum (2001)<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/JcL3a6REODk&hl=en"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/JcL3a6REODk&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-80316829056403256792008-04-22T21:19:00.004-04:002008-05-06T19:15:15.872-04:00My Favourite Bollywood Songs - Part 1This is the first instalment of my favourite songs.<br /><br />This is one song I used to listen to as a child and I think that has a huge part to play in me loving this song. It reminds me of my childhood. Plus, it's super catchy.<br /><br />Song: <a href="http://www.lyricsmasti.com/song/174/get_lyrics_of_Mehbooba-Mehbooba.html">Mehbooba O Mehbooba </a>(Beloved oh Beloved)<br />Film: Sholay (1975)<br /><br /><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/PIc5ALdd4NY&hl=en"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/PIc5ALdd4NY&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-81866982250224099912008-04-21T21:24:00.010-04:002008-12-09T09:02:21.097-05:00I'm Not Worthy<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SA1BbqWkCkI/AAAAAAAAAJY/6zrBQiZ3fHY/s1600-h/BoysAreStupid.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5191877888909249090" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SA1BbqWkCkI/AAAAAAAAAJY/6zrBQiZ3fHY/s320/BoysAreStupid.jpg" border="0" /></a>Have I said I hate men? Well, ok I don't <em>hate </em>men. Not all men. But some. Men have done such a good job of making me feel less worthy. I know I shouldn't base my own worth on other people but its hard not to when you find out your ex didn't want to tell his parents about you, yet his parents have already met his new girlfriend and love her. Ugh! I hate men. It's hard not to base your self worth on other people when another ex was in love with another girl the whole time he was with you. Ugh Ugh!! I still hate men. It's hard not to base your self worth on other people when yet another ex tells you you are not a good Muslim and need to change. Ugh Ugh Ugh!!!<br /><br />And then not to mention the guys who expect a little something for "free" from you. Jerks!<br /><br />Seriously, there are very few good men out there. My apologies to the good ones. I don't hate you. I don't know very many of you. Other than the men in my family I can only think of 3 guys who I would say are good guys. And all three are off limits for me.Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-9392239278378326472008-04-20T15:47:00.003-04:002008-04-20T15:50:58.113-04:00As I was Procrastinating I Found This...<em>This post is from </em><a href="http://hijabman.com/index.php"><em>HijabMan</em></a><em> and can be found </em><a href="http://hijabman.com/journal/fear-can-stop-your-love-what-about-your-god-consciousness"><em>here</em></a>.<br /><br />Fear can stop your love, what about your God-consciousness?<br /><br />One of the first steps one takes when <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gtd">Getting Things Done</a> is the process of capturing/collecting the thoughts floating around in your head, everything that has your attention. After that harder-than-it-sounds task, you file it into your system (whether that consists of folders or electronic means). Now, If you are really good about keeping that system up-to-date and flowing well, a trust with that system naturally develops. Ideally, if you trust that system, you no longer need to actively think about everything you need to do or every thought in your head.*<br /><br />I’m not even close to completely emptying my head of the multitude of crap that is plaguing my brain, but I’ve definitely gotten better. But the fact that I’ve even emptied my head of just a fraction of that crap has reduced my stress level dramatically.<br /><br />While thinking (hah!) about this process, a thought occurred to me that connected this idea with spirituality. What about emptying ourselves of the various forms of fear that plague us? Wouldn’t that enable us as believers to be more God-conscious and free us? Imagine your life without insecurity, worry, and even procrastination. They can all be forms of fear.<br />Procrastination is fear? What?<br /><br />In fact, it is the most consuming fear I have! Think about it. We tend to avoid those things that we are afraid of. As many <a href="http://www.43folders.com/2006/10/10/productive-talk-procrastination/">personal-productivity gurus explain,</a> one of the reasons (or is it the only reason?) we procrastinate, is because we are afraid of what comes “next.” The future. If we busy ourselves with not-so-productive tasks, we delay impending decisions and new projects.<br />My current slip-up (one of a few) has to do with delaying a simple phone call, a phone call that would lead to my decision to go back to school. I was afraid of something without a name. It was one of those down-deep fears. On the surface, it may have been fear of failure, debt, and well, just school in general. Am I disciplined enough for it? I delay these big decisions by putting off tasks like paying bills, cleaning, dishes. Do you see where I’m going now?<br /><br />I let the gravel gather up, so that all that I’m concerned about is sweeping away that gravel. And because I am so consumed by sweeping those little rocks away I don’t have time to think about the big rocks** I have to move. And I’m so worried about the gravel and the big rocks combined that I don’t have any time to reflect and realize that the biggest rocks I need to move are these deep-down-I-don’t-even-know-what-they-are fears. And dealing with those means I have to ask some really hard questions of myself. Those questions I don’t want to ask, if you know what I mean. In my experience, the process of going to those “scary” places leads to one place: If I am aware that God is in control, and that I should just strive, the idea of fearing something so silly, you know, like future, would be laughable. Indeed, I often laugh at my irrational fears (after the fact, of course ;)<br /><br />What do you think? Does this have merit? That one would be have a clearer path to God-consciousness by doing some kind of mental sweep of [all of the forms] of fear?<br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">*I’m simplifying the GTD process, if you are interested, go </span><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Getting-Things-Done-Stress-Free-Productivity/dp/0142000280/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-3541817-3907102?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1181996854&sr=8-1"><span style="font-size:85%;">buy the book.</span></a><br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">**I got the concept of the Big Rocks/Gravel from ZenHabits’ </span><a href="http://zenhabits.net/2007/04/big-rocks-first-double-your-productivity-this-week/"><span style="font-size:85%;">Big Rocks First</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;"> article.</span>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-48884176759453941742008-04-18T18:11:00.014-04:002008-12-09T09:02:21.295-05:00Happy - Not So Happy<div align="center"><br /><a href="http://fenrizwolf.deviantart.com/art/Happy-Tree-Friends-Nutty-33272702"></a>Yay! I'm done my paper. Happy!<br /><br />But I lost sleep to do it and am quite sleepy now. Not so happy.<br /><br />And it's hot outside. Happy!<br /><br />But I don't have much in terms of summer clothes. Not so happy.<br /><br />I need to go shopping which I enjoy. Happy!<br /><br />But I don't have much money. Not so happy.<br /><br /><br /></div><a href="http://roarysea.deviantart.com/art/happy-35068792"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190715462425383810" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAkgNiP-E4I/AAAAAAAAAJQ/32ey2U-8qH0/s320/happy_by_roarysea.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAkdgyP-E2I/AAAAAAAAAJA/ggB6gGFKSXw/s1600-h/Happy_Tree_Friends___Nutty_by_FenrizWolf.jpg"></a>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-9535411788215479922008-04-16T20:04:00.033-04:002008-12-09T09:02:23.881-05:00Men I LoveI've been tired lately and completely sick of school. I'm working on a paper for my qualitative psychology class due this Friday and it is so torturous. I have no interest in it at though I did when I first started it. I am analyzing Hindi film songs for constructions of heterosexual romantic relationships. I thought it would be fun but at this point it is just a chore.<br /><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><div></div><br />So I can't write any intelligent post. Therefore, I'm posting pictures of beautiful men. Not objectification, but rather as a Cheerful Bird once told me, simply admiring God's creation.<br /><div><div><div><div><div><div><div><div><div><div></div><div><br />I present - Men I think are beautiful:<br /><br /></div><div></div><div><div><div><div><div><div><div><div><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shahrukh_Khan"><strong>Shah Rukh Khan</strong></a> <a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaaUiP-EkI/AAAAAAAAAGw/bs1B0CmMQbo/s1600-h/srkann.jpg"></a></div><br /><div></div><div></div><div>This guy is over 40 and still hot! Love the beard on him. </div><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaeziP-EvI/AAAAAAAAAII/ri3qPHHrqLQ/s1600-h/srk-snap.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190010228795380466" style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaeziP-EvI/AAAAAAAAAII/ri3qPHHrqLQ/s320/srk-snap.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAae7iP-EwI/AAAAAAAAAIQ/y028Kph4NJc/s1600-h/srk-cdi.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190010366234333954" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAae7iP-EwI/AAAAAAAAAIQ/y028Kph4NJc/s320/srk-cdi.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><div><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaZ4CP-EiI/AAAAAAAAAGg/0w-k2x2vcVY/s1600-h/03tagheuer-Shah-Rukh-Khan-2.jpg"></a></div><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><div><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaZ4CP-EiI/AAAAAAAAAGg/0w-k2x2vcVY/s1600-h/03tagheuer-Shah-Rukh-Khan-2.jpg"></a></div><div></div><div><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaZ4CP-EiI/AAAAAAAAAGg/0w-k2x2vcVY/s1600-h/03tagheuer-Shah-Rukh-Khan-2.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190004808546652706" style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaZ4CP-EiI/AAAAAAAAAGg/0w-k2x2vcVY/s320/03tagheuer-Shah-Rukh-Khan-2.jpg" border="0" /></a></div><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAabUSP-EmI/AAAAAAAAAHA/iHVInnCQo4Y/s1600-h/srkann.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190006393389584994" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAabUSP-EmI/AAAAAAAAAHA/iHVInnCQo4Y/s320/srkann.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><div></div><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><div><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saif_Ali_Khan"><strong>Saif Ali Khan</strong></a></div></div></div></div></div><br /><p>Oh so cute! Seriously, him and Kareena Kapoor make a stunning couple.</p><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAad5CP-EsI/AAAAAAAAAHw/2oyO6abiV4M/s1600-h/1876_photo.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190009223773033154" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAad5CP-EsI/AAAAAAAAAHw/2oyO6abiV4M/s320/1876_photo.jpg" border="0" /></a> <a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaediP-EuI/AAAAAAAAAIA/iqyVoddtgdo/s1600-h/Saif%2520Ali%2520Khan.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190009850838258402" style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaediP-EuI/AAAAAAAAAIA/iqyVoddtgdo/s320/Saif%2520Ali%2520Khan.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><p><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAadjyP-EqI/AAAAAAAAAHg/tUqOfMIqIjA/s1600-h/aif_ali_khan_kbc4.jpg"></a></p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAad-iP-EtI/AAAAAAAAAH4/GrIi3yoRJMc/s1600-h/saif-ali-khan-kareena-kapoor-story.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190009318262313682" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAad-iP-EtI/AAAAAAAAAH4/GrIi3yoRJMc/s320/saif-ali-khan-kareena-kapoor-story.jpg" border="0" /></a> <p><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAadjyP-EqI/AAAAAAAAAHg/tUqOfMIqIjA/s1600-h/aif_ali_khan_kbc4.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190008858700812962" style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAadjyP-EqI/AAAAAAAAAHg/tUqOfMIqIjA/s320/aif_ali_khan_kbc4.jpg" border="0" /></a></p><br /><p></p><p></p><p><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAadjyP-EqI/AAAAAAAAAHg/tUqOfMIqIjA/s1600-h/aif_ali_khan_kbc4.jpg"></a></p><br /><p><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAadjyP-EqI/AAAAAAAAAHg/tUqOfMIqIjA/s1600-h/aif_ali_khan_kbc4.jpg"></a></p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><p><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAadjyP-EqI/AAAAAAAAAHg/tUqOfMIqIjA/s1600-h/aif_ali_khan_kbc4.jpg"></a></p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><div><div><div><div><div><div><div><div><div><div></div><div><br /><br /><strong></strong><p></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p></p><p><br /><br /><br /><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abhishek_Bachchan"><strong>Abhishek Bachchan</strong><strong></a></strong></p><p>I think this guy is hot BUT he's married to Ashwariya Rai (sorry I mean Bachchan) who I really am not impressed with. Plus he's Amitabh Bachchan's son who I have heard is not too fond of Muslims. And the beard is the magic for me. Don't know what I think of him without that facial hair. What can I say? I'm a sucker for beards. Maybe the Muslim in me...</p><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaf3CP-EyI/AAAAAAAAAIg/tCCp0MC3PCo/s1600-h/Abhishek_Bachchan2.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190011388436550434" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaf3CP-EyI/AAAAAAAAAIg/tCCp0MC3PCo/s320/Abhishek_Bachchan2.jpg" border="0" /></a> <a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaf_yP-EzI/AAAAAAAAAIo/harre7U50bU/s1600-h/abhishek_bachchan.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190011538760405810" style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAaf_yP-EzI/AAAAAAAAAIo/harre7U50bU/s320/abhishek_bachchan.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><p></p></div></div></div><br /><br /><div><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></div><br /><br /><div><br /></div><div>And of course...</div><div></div><div></div><br /><br /><div><strong><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Abraham_(actor)">John Abraham</a></strong></div><div></div><br /><div>I don't need to say anything...</div><br /><div></div><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAagaiP-E0I/AAAAAAAAAIw/lZ2A21rZJUg/s1600-h/John2.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190011998321906498" style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAagaiP-E0I/AAAAAAAAAIw/lZ2A21rZJUg/s320/John2.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAageCP-E1I/AAAAAAAAAI4/1scioU7XLMY/s1600-h/241708071207.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5190012058451448658" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAageCP-E1I/AAAAAAAAAI4/1scioU7XLMY/s320/241708071207.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div><br /><br /></div><br /><br /><p></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-41918419584070976032008-04-12T14:03:00.006-04:002008-12-09T09:02:24.195-05:00Picture This<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAD-hbJHZII/AAAAAAAAAGY/OxqBEnjqSio/s1600-h/Indian_village_women_by_parulbajaj.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5188426620905940098" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Aor3_m-knjc/SAD-hbJHZII/AAAAAAAAAGY/OxqBEnjqSio/s320/Indian_village_women_by_parulbajaj.jpg" border="0" /></a>There many Muslims, stupid, ignorant Muslims, who will say that having/taking/making pictures or drawings of people is haram. Well, it's not. How could it be when Prophet Soloman (pbuh) had his jinns make statues for him? If two dimensional pictures were haram then for certain statues of a person would be too. And a prophet of God would not do anything haram would he?<br /><div></div><br /><div>Surah Saba</div><div>34:12-13 <div></div><br /><div></div><div></div><div><em>12. And for Solomon the wind was given, traveling one month coming and one month going, and We caused a spring of tar to flow for him. And from among the Jinn are those that worked for him by his Lord's leave; and any one of them who turns from Our commands, We shall cause him to taste the retribution of the Fire. <div></div><br /><div><br /></em></div><div><em>13. They made for him what he desired of enclosures, and statues, and pools of deep reservoirs, and heavy pots. “O family of David, work to show thanks.” Only a few of My servants are appreciative. </em></div><br /><div></div><br /><div></div></div></div>Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-6614023842138019462008-04-11T13:46:00.007-04:002008-04-11T15:24:06.020-04:00I Wish I Was PregnantWell, alright. I don't know if I want to be pregnant per say, but I do want a baby. My maternal clock is ticking and every time I see a baby I just fall apart. Their cute little chubby cheeks and their giggles. Oh...I'm melting. I'm so craving a baby.<br /><br />And the new Pampers commercial didn't help. I guess they have a new campaign where if you buy a specially marked bag of Pampers diapers, Pampers will <a href="http://www.pampers.com/en_US/unicef_homepage.do">donate</a> one tetanus vaccine to UNICEF to be used on mothers and their newborns in needy places in the world. A large part of me finds it so annoying when corporations use social issues to sell their products. Exploiting people's problems. Why not just donate anyways? But I guess they need to make the money to donate it. Ugh! Capitalism! Anyhow.....<br /><br />In the commercial we see a White woman with a stroller who has bought such a bag. As she is walking down the street she sees a what I presume to be a South Asian baby with his mother(who I believe is Muslim as his mother is wearing a dupatta on her head). She then sees a little Mexican baby in a poncho run up to her. Oh so cute but oh so cliched. The baby's mother comes to get it - she's dressed in traditional, native Mexican garb. Finally, a Japanese baby comes to her and gives her a kiss as she lifts him just before it's mother, dressed in a kimono, comes for it.<br /><br />The baby's were adorable and pulled at my heart strings. But I couldn't help but laugh at the very obvious attempt at differentiating the ethnicities of the baby's and their mothers. I understood the South Asian mother. Many women in that part of the world do indeed dress like that. But from my understanding very few women in Japan wear the kimono on a daily basis. Additionally, the Mexican native woman's child was wearing pants underneath the poncho. If it's mother is wearing such traditional garb then wouldn't the child too?<br /><br />Anyhow, this commercial did not help my situation. I want a baby more than ever now. I'll dress her/him up in traditional Pakistani clothes - just because they look so cute in it.<br /><br />Side note: I have the TV on and A Baby Story just came on with the scene of a woman in labour pains. I had to switch the channel. Nothing will deter me from wanting a baby. Not even her moans of pain.Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1611160878461950112.post-41598663618854618802008-04-10T14:58:00.005-04:002008-04-10T16:30:49.629-04:00Do we need love?I really should be working on a paper. And I will. But first I felt the need to complain. Complain about where I am in life.<br /><br />Now don't get me wrong. God has given me so much and I will be eternally grateful for all that He has given me. I am truly blessed. But I think and hope God will understand if I complain every now and then. After all I am human and it is human nature. I cannot be happy all the time. So....<br /><br />Yet ANOTHER friend of mine is getting married. Sorry, another TWO friends. And here I am, almost 30 and not a proposal on the horizon. But, you might say, a lot can happen in a short amount of time girl. You never know. And I will <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">respond</span> with, yes, I know. But that's what I thought two and half years ago when I moved away from my hometown which is small with a non-<span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">existent</span> young, Muslim, male population.<br /><br />However, this is not a rant because I am alone. I am fine with being alone. My complaint is about the looks of pity I get from others. My complaint is about the pressure my parents feel to get me married off. My complaint is about the culture that tells us that women are nothing without a male companion. My complaint is about the culture that tells us that marriage is about companionship and not love.<br /><br />I know that when I get married I will most likely be getting married because it will be the right thing to do. I think my match is someone with whom I will be compatible and get along with - not someone I will love. I do not even know if I am capable of loving someone. I think my heart is too tired to love. I think my mind is too tired. Or maybe love really is overrated. I often see myself as one of those <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">desi</span> women who gets married because that is what she is supposed to do. I will devote myself to my husband because that is what a good <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">desi</span> wife does.<br /><br />Or maybe I'm scared to get married. Maybe because there is no one in my life right now who I want to marry it seems unnatural and unrealistic. At this point getting married does seem like a terrifying prospect because getting married at this point would mean marrying someone I don't know or love.<br /><br />Yet, despite all this I crave being in a relationship. I crave having someone. I crave the conversations, the excitement, the passion, the weak knees, the butterflies in my stomach, the comfort. I do feel that as a heterosexual woman I do need that special someone.<br /><br />I don't know if writing this will have negative repercussions for me. There are walls around me which I'd like to take down but the risk is too high. Who knows what will happen with me. Who knows what God's plan is.<br /><br />I know things will get better. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">Insha'Allah</span>. But for now I'm feeling a lot of confusion. We'll see where things go in my life.Farheenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05432706760059040473noreply@blogger.com2